Today it happened.
I’ve been hungry lately. People have been saying, “He’s a fat little bugger, ain’t he?” and my human got upset and started starving me. I tried to tell her that they were just jealous, and it is best to ignore them and be aloof. Or I could chivvy them up a tree. In fact, I’d like that. But starvation! She said that it was not starvation but a diet, but when I asked what a diet was, she said, “Well, it’s when you don’t eat as much food as you like.” I think that is starvation.
Another reason I’ve been hungry is that my person has been taking me for walks. She’s been really busy lately, at “work,” and she spends a lot of time sitting in an uncomfortable chair at the table, poking at the innards of a flat thing that opens up. I’m afraid she loves it more than she loves me, so I’ve been pensive with perhaps a bit of dignified sorrow (my mother said that we were Teutons, so we feel life deeply). I was grieving silently in the center of the living room, staring at my person and sighing a bit, when she suddenly leaped up and said, “Okay, let’s go for a walk and get the sulks out of you!” I was excited to learn that I had sulks in me, and I wondered what they smelled like. She put me on my nice long leash, and then walked me quickly all over. We even got to play in some bushes and low-hanging tree branches. It’s my favorite game when I’m on my long leash. I run back and forth and around and under as much as I can, and then when I can’t move any more, she comes and tries to do exactly what I just did, but she never pays as much attention to the fun smells as to my leash. We’ve been doing this every day. Then we come home and I feel hungry. Then my person gives me a little bit more kibble, but I don’t think it is enough.
My mother told me that when I was worried about being hungry I should consider the birds of the air and some lilies. They were once sent to a group of hungry dachshunds who were walked through the desert for forty days, without ever finding their beds and foodbowls. But they didn’t starve, because food was dropped from heaven—sometimes kibble, and sometimes the birds. Mother said that the same thing could happen for me, if I prayed with a pure heart and perfect trust. And today it did. I was standing next to a friend’s feet while he ate something out of a box (he likes to eat standing up, so I keep him company). Suddenly, the air was full of kibble (heavenly kibble, lighter and sweeter than normal kibble), raining all around me! I ate until I was full, and there was more left over.
